Monday, May 30, 2011



This weekend the RVRG (Rideau Valley Roller Girls) kicked off their home season with what they dubbed a 'Coaches Pick' bout. Essentially an all-star game style event with girls from the league split up onto different teams. It is late and I'm tired and even though I worked as a score catcher at the event, at the moment I totally forget the score. I do know that team white came from behind and racked up a whole bunch a points to take the victory. I wasn't really cheering for either team (since they were all from my favorite Ottawa teams), but none the less enjoyed watching a great bout. You would think that the ladies might tone it down a notch since it was a inter-league team-mate vs team-mate event. They did not. They played as if it were the championship finals. I flinched a number of times while witnessing a hard knock down or wipe out. Looking forward to the next game in June. I wish there were more. And why isn't derby on tv? The sports channel plays poker, but not derby!? Madness.

Sunday, May 29, 2011



I love it when you tell someone about a movie and it is so out there that the person doesn't even believe that you're telling the truth and thinks the thing is made up. Hobo with a Shotgun has been one of those movies for me the past lil' while. I've told a number of folks about it who all basically said in return, "That's not a movie!". Clearly these people aren't keeping on top of their geek studies. This film is not only a new Canadian cinematic classic, it also holds the honour of being the project that graduated from being a fake trailer contest winner for the Rodriguez / Tarantino mega Grindhouse double bill.

You can witness the madness that is Rutger Hauer playing a shotgun wielding homeless person fighting evil in the streets of Halifax on Monday May 30th & Tuesday the 31st at 9:15pm at the Mayfair as part of Lost Marbles Geek Nights.

Monday, May 23, 2011



On the heels of my Night of the Living Dead related travelings, an article from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in the States came to my attention. Believe it or not, the topic of the piece was Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse. Who could ever have guessed that the CDCP was so awesome!? I hope that some people stumbled on this article, read it, and actually thought that the end was upon them, War of the Worlds radio-play style misunderstanding in full effect.

Also, I just noticed that the gravestone that I was so excited to see is actually for not one but two infants. Makes it seem even more inappropriate and morbid to take pictures and be in awe of such a thing as a movie prop. I hope that the lil' 1800's Kramer ghost babies understand that I mean no disrespect and do not haunt me.

Sunday, May 22, 2011



Another Vixens road-trip equals another thumping of the opposition. This bout ended up being the rather lop-sided final score of Vixens 212 - Pittsburgh 71, further proof that the Rideau Valley Roller Girls are producing some of the finest derby girls in all the lands.

If participating in another out-of-town RVRG bout wasn't enough fun, also found time to visit one of the filming locations of one of my favorite movies of all time. A trio of referees and I headed to the neighbouring town of Evans City, a lovely little place that still had some nice small town charm, real old fashioned architecture and an actual movie theatre. Why did we go to this seemingly random Pennsylvania location you ask? Well, to visit their fine cemetery of course, which just happened to be one of the filming locations for only one of my favorite movies of all time. The birthplace of the modern and most well known type of zombie happened there in the late sixties under the direction of George Romero, the movie was of course Night of the Living Dead.

Found the gravestone I was looking for incredibly easily. The driver parked the car, I stepped out, looked pretty much right ahead of me, and there it was. It's a strange thought at how gleefully excited I was at visiting this place filled with dead people, an actual working graveyard for which it's usual visitors aren't so happy. Was actually a slightly overwhelming feeling, I didn't break down into tears or anything (I'll save that for if I ever get to visit a Star Wars location), but it is a simple thing that I was able to do that I will definitely hold up on a pedestal as one of the highlight moments of my life. And something done that will make many a movie geek that I know very very jealous.

Friday, May 20, 2011



What better way to spend the day that the rapture will befall our planet than partaking in some Roller Derby watching in Pittsburgh? Today I will venture road-trip style to Pennsylvania with my Rideau Valley Roller Girl posse (specifically the Vixens) as they psyche themselves up to do battle against the Steel City Derby Demons on Saturday. Besides for helping out at score-keeping in some manner, I hope to also eat some delicious American delicacies and maybe just maybe visit one of the shooting location of one of my favorite movies of all time. Will update the events of the trip if, y'know, the world as we know it still exists and we're all still around after the weekend.

Thursday, May 19, 2011



Indie cult director Brett Kelly (My Dead Girlfriend, Prey for the Beast) is maybe one of Canada's most prolific independent filmmakers. Brett has directed no less than eighteen feature films and has quite a few more projects on the way. I myself have worked on pretty much all of Brett's bazillion projects (well, more like eighteen or so I guess).

Brett Kelly Entertainment recently announced the release of a two disc, three movie set of some of Brett's earliest work titled NORTHERN FRIGHTS: THE EARLY FILMS OF BRETT KELLY. The set includes Kelly's first feature film, the lycanthrophic FERAL MAN (2002), the slasher/mystery FINAL CURTAIN (2004)and the boogeyman tale BONESETTER RETURNS (2005). The DVD set includes commentary tracks, behind the scenes footage, interviews and more. NORTHERN FRIGHTS shipped May 1st (I'm way behind in some of my blog notices as per usual, meant to bring this up earlier) and can be ordered directly from Brett's website at www.brettkelly.net

Tuesday, May 17, 2011



Wednesday night (May 18th) marks the return of our Rideau Valley Roller Girls sponsored events at the Mayfair. Three more films will follow in June to August, and we kick things off with a campy tale of roller-skating seventies style. Our two heroes fall in love and must put a stop to a mob boss with evil hopes of closing down the roller rink so he can make use of the land for his own nefarious means (really...that's what it is about!).

Members of the trio of Rideau Valley Roller Girls teams will be in attendance, fresh off the landslide of a wind last weekend in Sudbury (197 - 25). And they'll have tickets on hand to sell for their home-opener, on Saturday May 28th.

I can't imagine that anyone would need more incitement than the thought of a movie theatre like the Mayfair packed with roller derby girls watching an old bad movie. But if you did, I can also tell you that there will be Auntie Loo's cupcakes on hand, and maybe a prize or two to give away.

Monday, May 16, 2011



I'm not one who goes out of my way to hit the multiplexes for my movie watching. The only time I really go is when I have a sneak preview free screening pass, or on rare occasion when I make use of points off my Visa card (a bonus feature that is much more useful when one does not co-own an indie repertory theatre that he goes to all the time).

Tonight I will go to the Mayfair to re-see PAUL. I saw it making use of one of those sneak preview free screening passes mentioned above, at a very sub-par theatre. So excited was I to see the latest offering from Nick Frost and Simon Pegg though, I went to the bland little multiplex theatre to get to see the movie as soon as I possibly could. Tonight I get to re-enjoy this lil' geeky sci fi masterpiece, and this time the whole thing will actually be in focus!

Sunday, May 15, 2011



Road trip to and from Sudbury completed and survived (got home a lil' while ago, had to watch the Doctor Who scripted by Neil Gaiman before doing anything else). If you ever have an opportunity to take a road-trip with a trio of funny roller derby girls, I highly recommend that you do so. I cannot equally recommend that Sudbury be your number one destination choice to road-trip to. I mean no offense to the fine people of Sudbury, I ran into a number of swell folks, but I have to say that a large portion of the city was sketchy at best or scary at worst. Saw some hooligans loitering outside of a Tim Horton's that I'm pretty sure I could've asked where to find the nearest underground dog-fighting match or the hardest of illegal drug to purchase.

The game itself went smashingly well for my Rideau Valley Roller Girls, with a final score of 197 - 25. And the score wasn't even that high only because I was running the scoreboard, it was a well deserved victory. I mean, any time in a sport where you can subtract 150 points from the winning teams score and still win comfortably, it is a fine win indeed. All that, plus my friends and I got to go and check out one of the eight great wonders of the world, the giant nickel (ok...well, it's not really one of the eight great wonders of the world, but damn if it ain't a big nickel!). Next weekend the derby travels continue, this time a trip to the home of Mister Rogers and the birthplace of the modern zombie, Pittsburgh Pennsylvania.

Saturday, May 14, 2011



How do you top an excellent trip down to NYC, nothing less than the greatest city on earth? Sudbury! Sure, they don't have a Statue of Liberty or Empire State Building or Broadway or Nuts 4 Nuts...but they do have the worlds biggest nickel, and Nickel City Roller Derby. Hence, moments from now me and a stack of Free Comic Book Day reading material will be hopping into a car with a trio of Rideau Valley Roller Girls and road-tripping Sudbury's way. It's my first road game helping out the ref crew, madness and anarchy to ensue I'm sure

Friday, May 13, 2011



I do enjoy the concept of the blog, despite thinking that the name itself is kind of stupid, and that I'm sure there's roughly 875,000 bad ones for every good one. I'm not even sure how I started up with this specific blog, I guess to spread the word about some Batturtle short film productions. Then more recently it became mostly talking about Mayfair stuff, and then after that about roller derby bouts. Mainly just stuff I like and participate in.

Lately, strangely enough, I've been actually getting compliments on the blog writings. From friends that makes sense, as they know who I am and might check in on this thing every once and a while. But then I got some praise from a complete stranger. Which is nice of course, but I can't fathom anyone reading about cool Mayfair movies that are upcoming and having any interest in it. I will take the compliment though.

It sparked in my brain that I've been meaning to do more frequent writing (which I haven't been doing too poorly at lately), and having more diverse writing topics. So, at the top of this entry you'll see a not too great, rather grainy photo (not the photographers fault, it was taken from a cel phone) of the pain in progress that is my latest tattoo. As I type along currently, I do so with outstretched arms akin to the Universal Monsters era Mummy. Funny that, since it's the ink of the Universal Monsters character Creature from the Black Lagoon that has caused this inconvenience to my right limb.

A couple years ago I had no tattoos, now I have six-ish. I'm a little bit of a late bloomer in the being tattooed game, and have a slight sense that I want to catch up and get finished off in a shorter amount of time. Not that I'm rushing into anything or just randomly picking designs out of a book (no Tasmanian Devil or flaming skull here). Each design has meaning, has been thought through, and I think looks rather cool (luck and chaos theory attached me to an excellent artist). Each design is also terribly geeky. I might look bad-ass from afar, but on closer inspection it is easily revealed that I am a giant fan-boy of a geek.

I am definitely not the type of person that one might call tough. I have hands like a princess and have never thrown a punch or been on the run from the law. Inexplicably though I can handle the pain of a tattoo. My first tattoo was an arm-band, and I got nice praise from tattoo guys in the shop about my ability to have that done to me and not having to take a break or scream and writhe in pain. And, as everyone says, they are indeed addictive. So far I'm lucky, and all my ideas will fit accordingly on my two arms (though even that initial boundary has been broken a little bit).

Creature needs a bit more work. That will be followed by a Star Wars motif and then finishing off the Doctor Who outer space theme (with TARDIS and all) that is also in progress of completion. And believe it or not it only gets more geeky from there.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011



Next week the Mayfair will continue it's storied tradition of having special screenings presented by the Rideau Valley Roller Girls in conjunction with home games of their fine roller derby teams. The girls have their home opener on the horizon, and to celebrate the Mayfair will showcase none other than the 70's roller-skatin' classic 'Roller Boogie'. Not a roller derby movie of course, but alas there are only so many of those out there. We've already screened the likes of 'Whip It', 'Kansas City Bomber' and a number of documentaries...so now we switch gears to a roller-skate themed disco drama starring Linda Blair from 'The Exorcist', from the director of 'Commando' and 'Firestarter' (a strange resume indeed). I wouldn't say that this movie is good per say, but it is indeed thoroughly enjoyable in a movie experience that is so bad that it's good.

The Rideau Valley Roller Girls present their first of four films in four months of an extended mini-film fest: Roller Boogie - Wednesday May 18th at 9:15pm at the Mayfair

Tuesday, May 10, 2011



A couple of months ago, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost produced one of the funniest things ever to appear on the interwebs, the failed attempts of a shot-for-shot remake of the Star Wars trilogy. It was smart, and hilarious, and wonderfully geeky. Those three things are more-or-less the cornerstone of the calibrations of these two gentlemen when they work together actually.

Watch any of the three projects that they've done with director Edgar Wright (Spaced, Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz) and you with see all three of those descriptive traits. If you do not like any of these said projects, we cannot be friends. Harsh and irrational I know, but opinion on such matters are deal-breaker in nature for me.

The latest project from Nick and Simon will soon come to the Mayfair, titled PAUL, it breaks away from their frequent collaborator Edgar Wright. He was off busy directing my favorite movie of 2010, Scott Pilgrim vs the World. So the lads went off and had their film made by the director of Superbad and episodes of Arrested Development and Undeclared (impressive stuff all around).

The plot of PAUL? A couple of geeks from the UK stumble on an on the run alien after heading out from the San Diego Comic Con for a cross country U.S.A. road trip. Comedic amount of chase filled action and adventure ensues, along with a whole buncha comic book and Star Wars references.

The Mayfair presents a Lost Marbles Geek Night of PAUL: Monday May 16th at 9:15pm, with an encore screening on Tuesday May 17th at 9:00pm.

Friday, May 06, 2011



One more sleep 'till Free Comic Book Day ! No tricks, no catches, no evil ploys to get your hard earned money. My favorite holiday of the year is unbelievably in it's tenth year. So, as per every year on the first Saturday in May, tomorrow I will be getting up bright and early and heading to a comic shop and elbowing children out of my way so I can get to as many free comic books as I possibly can. I hope you have time to do the same.

Thursday, May 05, 2011



Over the past couple years I've found myself slowly caring less and less about the game of hockey. Very unpatriotic, I know, but it has happened none-the-less. This turn hasn't happened because the Ottawa Senators went from being a great team to a playoff missing team, I'm not jumping off a band-wagon. I went to three games in the 2010 / 2011 season, 2 games that I won tickets to and 1 that was a birthday gift. I had a good enough time at each of the games, but continued to find myself just really not caring.

I used to care about hockey. I used to care a lot. I would watch games under great amounts of stress, holding my breath and coming out the end either ecstatic or in the pits of despair depending on the outcome. And I couldn't figure out why I stopped caring. I think it was a lot of things. I got jaded as to millionaires playing a game that kids like to play, I hated how players swapped teams so often that you lose track of who plays for who, and I know I got tired of people from other cities (I'm looking at Montreal and Toronto specifically) wanting to argue with me and being disparaging just 'cause we liked different logo's.

Then I realized what it really was that tore me away from a life long passion for hockey watching. It was roller derby. It was totally roller derby. A couple years ago roller derby came to Ottawa. I was very excited, having fallen in love with roller derby after having been hooked on an A&E documentary series from a few years back called ROLLERGIRLS. I went to the first bout that the RIDEAU VALLEY ROLLER GIRLS held here in Ottawa, and haven't missed a home bout since.

Soon after we started a tradition of showing Roller Derby themed movies at the Mayfair that the RVRG's presented. We've shown documentaries and stuff like Kansas City Bomber and Switchblade Sisters (which has an excellent climactic gun battle in a roller derby rink). I've even gotten involved on doing ref crew stuff, and now I find myself friends with a bunch of roller derby ladies.

So, to finally get to the point here, last Sunday in Montreal my Slaughter Daughters won the Beast of the East tournament in Montreal. Quite the accomplishment indeed, and I watch via the magic of the interweb while wearing my Slaughter Daughters shirt and matching red Converse. I don't know what the world record is for holding ones breath is, but I'm pretty sure that I broke it. Then, when the girls managed a stunning come from behind upset victory, I leaped to my feet, knocking over my chair and scaring the hell out of my cat. You can relive the glory (I'm pretty sure the greatest moment in sports history I thinks) thanks to the YouTube below.

Looking very forward to the home opener bout on May 28th.